Tecumseh Files For Bankruptcy
T Court-
After decades of sitting pretty in self-titled T-Court, Tecumseh is ready to call it quits. The bronze statue of famed Native American chief Tecumseh applied for bankruptcy this week after suffering through years of financial woe. "My revenue has been dropping steadily since about 1960, when mids were still into the coin tossing thing." Known as the god of 2.0, Tecumseh or "Mr. T" as he likes to be called, cites a drop in the quantity and quality of coins thrown into his quiver. "I got to say, this is a really dangerous business. Do you know how many times I've caught a rusty penny in my eye? I can't even blink!"
The bust planned to take a vacation this May, but fiscal demands will keep Tecumseh in his spot for an undetermined amount of time. "I really needed a vacation. Seriously, you try staring at the same corner of Bancroft Hall 24/7. I'd like to go to Bora Bora some time in my life." In his bankruptcy report, Tecumseh blamed midshipmen for bringing about his misfortunes. He explained, "I don't get paid nearly enough. For you it's all fun and games. 'HA HA let's paint the Indian! How about Buzz Lightyear this time? No, let's do Richard Gere.' You're all a bunch of assholes."
As a remedial measure, Tecumseh has raised his rates, charging $1 for every C that he conjures. He intends to honor his 2.0 code, but only on the condition that he receives a Sacajawea coin, or its equivalent, for every appeal. "I better see a pretty Indian lady falling into my quiver, or you're done. You see these arrows? They're made out of bronze. How'd you like one of those shot into your liver?"
Support Tecumseh.
After decades of sitting pretty in self-titled T-Court, Tecumseh is ready to call it quits. The bronze statue of famed Native American chief Tecumseh applied for bankruptcy this week after suffering through years of financial woe. "My revenue has been dropping steadily since about 1960, when mids were still into the coin tossing thing." Known as the god of 2.0, Tecumseh or "Mr. T" as he likes to be called, cites a drop in the quantity and quality of coins thrown into his quiver. "I got to say, this is a really dangerous business. Do you know how many times I've caught a rusty penny in my eye? I can't even blink!"
The bust planned to take a vacation this May, but fiscal demands will keep Tecumseh in his spot for an undetermined amount of time. "I really needed a vacation. Seriously, you try staring at the same corner of Bancroft Hall 24/7. I'd like to go to Bora Bora some time in my life." In his bankruptcy report, Tecumseh blamed midshipmen for bringing about his misfortunes. He explained, "I don't get paid nearly enough. For you it's all fun and games. 'HA HA let's paint the Indian! How about Buzz Lightyear this time? No, let's do Richard Gere.' You're all a bunch of assholes."
As a remedial measure, Tecumseh has raised his rates, charging $1 for every C that he conjures. He intends to honor his 2.0 code, but only on the condition that he receives a Sacajawea coin, or its equivalent, for every appeal. "I better see a pretty Indian lady falling into my quiver, or you're done. You see these arrows? They're made out of bronze. How'd you like one of those shot into your liver?"
Support Tecumseh.
posted by ditdahdahdit at 21:36
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