Brigade Decides To Return, Regret Ensues

Annapolis,MD-

The brigade is back, and with it, a special morning blend of skepticism, cynicism, and confusion. Most are not too worried though, as select midshipmen have returned with a strong helping of joetivation to share with the rest of the brigade. Says Jose "Salsa King" Valentin, "Yes, it's true. This is going to be the most professional year ever Cha cha cha!" Second-class Angreman expressed worry that the new deputy commandant might not live up to the standards that Colonel Fuquea established last year, "Alas, who will verbally rape us for minor issues now?!"

Many are less than optimistic about the year, like Midshipwoman Third-Class Sawyer, whose attractiveness mysteriously increased with the addition of an anchor on her collar. "Look, it's gonna be like last year, except I get to openly date my firstie boyfriend. Eat shit Naval Academy!"